How to Lure a Golddigger
by Marc H. RudovToro! Toro! Matadormat
I’ve written extensively about my disdain for entitled women and how to avoid them. In fact, my latest book — Under the Clitoral Hood: How to Crank Her Engine Without Cash, Booze, or Jumper CablesTM — advises men about having mutually satisfying sex with their girlfriends and wives, without giving them meals, vacations, cars, and jewelry in exchange.
Such counsel, however, doesn’t resonate with all men, as Meghan Barr’s recent article — “Who’s Your (Sugar) Daddy?” — reminded me. Among other gems, Barr relates the one of Cristine Gomez, 21, who “dated” an older man she met on wealthymen.com. During their three-month tryst, this feckless dude took care of Cristine’s rent, car payments, and college tuition. She viewed his outlays as a natural part of the “relationship” (she meant contract). How ironic that a man with economic power lacks the personal power to aim higher in life.
Despite the dire economic consequences, plenty of men — especially those weak in the confidence department — flaunt their wealth to lure women. This is legal prostitution. In such a transaction, the man has as low an opinion of his acquired trophy as he does of himself — a perfect match. For every hand, there is a glove. So, it is fitting that, for every man’s handful of cash, there is at least one corresponding money-grubbing female glove. Taking the path of least resistance, golddiggers seek the easiest source of gold. And, why not? Men who register on golddigging Websites make it embarrassingly easy for them.
It dawned on me, while formulating this article, that a wealth-flaunting man resembles a matador, besplendored in macho attire, proudly flashing his assets, daring to put himself at risk. A matador — literally a killer — has his picador and banderilleros, helpers who wear down the bull by thrusting banderillas into its hide. So, when the matador enters the ring, the bull is already weary, half-defeated. All he need do is run the bull ragged, luring it back and forth across the ring with his red cape, until he can jam his sword between its shoulder blades and into its heart. In the blood-soaked soil of this rigged contest, the matador stands victorious before the cheering crowd.
The munificent matador of mesdames won’t be as sanguine about his plight. Any man who taunts a woman to take his capital, by waving it in her face, ultimately finds her walking all over him. In essence, he becomes her doormat. Accordingly, I’ve coined a new term — matadormat — by combining matador and doormat. Unlike the bull matador, the matadormat doesn’t have helpers with spears. He doesn’t face a weary adversary, and he cannot win.
To the contrary, Ms. Golddigger is energetic and poised for victory. She has the helper, Senor El Toro, Esquire, and she will be victorious. Her arena is not in Malaga, Spain; it’s across town in family court. Yes, Ms. Golddigger will ride into the ring atop the bull to skewer the defenseless matadormat. Think alimony. Think palimony. Think blackmail. Just think, for crying out loud!
Steven D. Levitt, famed University of Chicago economist and coauthor of Freakonomics, states that incentives, positive and negative, are what drive all our behavior, and that there are three kinds: moral, social, and economic. This is why, I believe, that women have children out of wedlock. Hollywood influence has caused negative moral and social incentives to wane. And, there is a huge economic incentive — child support, which can be quite lucrative. Golddiggers exist for the same reasons. So, why will matadormats sacrifice their money and dignity for women? They use money to compensate for their inabilities to communicate and fornicate. Insecurity comes at a big price, and many guys seem willing to pay that price. How very sad.
NoNonsense Bottom Line
If you have a preference for deference, it’s quite easy to lure a golddigger. Wave your wealth in her face, and then waive your rights to half your income. Be prepared for the skewering of your dignity, for this is a rigged contest. If, however, you prize your wealth and dignity, and find catering to golddiggers emasculating, improve your communication and fornication skills. Ole!
About the Author
Marc H. Rudov is an internationally recognized author of 30+ articles and the books Under the Clitoral Hood: How to Crank Her Engine Without Cash, Booze, or Jumper CablesTM (ISBN 9780974501727), and The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women: How to Succeed in Romance on Planet EarthTM (ISBN 0974501719).
Rudov’s book, articles, blog, and podcasts are available at http://www.TheNoNonsenseMan.com/.
Copyright 2006 by Marc H. Rudov. All rights reserved.
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November 27th, 2006 at 3:30 pm
Here is something we can agree on! I have never understood rich guys who throw away their money like that! They will spend $100,000 in legal fees to defend a wage claim of $10,000 brought by a former employee whom they cheap-shitted on the overtime pay.
But then turn around and pay $100,000 to a gold digger lady for $1,000 worth of sex and a personal relationship worth as much as Heather Mills’ relationship with Paul McCartney.
It makes as much sense as Jewish liberals voting for a certain female Senator and former First Lady who once hugged and kissed Mrs. Arafat!
The only thing I can come up with these rich guys you write about, is that they too feel the biological clock.
Unlike us working stiffs and fleeced divorced guys, the rich dudes are more worried about getting all of their jollies before their skin gets too wrinkly and their bones too crinkly.
They are not so worried about running out of money before then.
I mean, why spend $50,000 on a new Corvette, when $10,000 can buy an old restored American muscle car that is just as much fun to cruise the freeways with?
Because the Corvette attracts the gold digger ladies!
Our disagreement is that just because you can crank her engine without cash, booze, or jumper cables, does not mean she will not be tempted to use the crazy court system to rob you of your cash.
Why?
You make a woman’s earth move.
Wonderful! She learns several things from this:
1) It’s possible to experience this. Sometimes the lady never has and literally did not know what she was missing.
2) You are one of the few guys who is not fooled by a fake orgasm and will endeavor to give her a real one. This makes her loyal to you until:
3) She figures out that she can teach the other guys what to do. Or how to generate it in herself through masterbation. Or with a lesbian girlfriend. It is not like this information is not readily available on the Internet!
4) And therefore, if she tires you for any reason, she can use the divorce court to separate you from your money and force you into alimony. If you went and had children with her because she fooled you into believing there was more to your relationship than good sex, you also get the wonderful benefits of child support.
5) By concentrating so much on making her earth move, she is learning the benefits of being completely selfish and how the world will cater to her selfishness.
6) If you just happen to have money for her to take, she will be tempted to take it, and get her orgasms from another man, no matter how good you are at generating them.
And we have a system of lawyers, judges, and government officials who make money off the no fault divorce and child support crusade and are thus perfectly happy to violate the Constitution to help her fleece you of your resources. The system is gender biased against the male breadwinner for the same reason Robin Hood stole from the rich: it is more profitable than stealing form the poor.
You write about pleasing women sexually and therefore reduce your risks of being fleeced.
November 27th, 2006 at 3:54 pm
Roger, it pains me to see girlie men who fear having fun in bed with women.
Also, as I’ve promised in the past, I will delete any and all references you make to your “cause.” Next time, I will delete your entire comment.
November 27th, 2006 at 4:07 pm
You will be pleased to know that I have no fear of having fun in bed with women.
For I have no funds remaining for them to take!
November 27th, 2006 at 6:31 pm
I am astounded to see grown men writing scathing screeds about women for no reason at all. Women are not at fault for every ill of the world.
Take responsibility for yourself and start looking in the mirror. When women are at fault, NOBODY blasts them harder than I do. If you read my two books and 30+ articles, you will see that.
To spend your entire life as a bitter man, because most women are screwed up and because the system is screwed up, is a waste of life. If you cannot have fun with women, I pity you. There are some terrific women in this world — women who really like men. You’ll never meet them if you’re bitter, and you’lll never summon the creativity or marshall the forces to fix the broken system.
Please contribute to my blog with constructive comments. Please don’t waste my blog criticizing my book because of its title: read it and follow my principles – and then give me your comments.
November 27th, 2006 at 6:58 pm
Yep, OK Marc. You have a good point. Most of what you write I can agree with. And you can be entertaining as well as imformed. But…..”Roger, it pains me to see girlie men who fear having fun in bed with women.”. Its only pain, Marc. Be a man. Suck it up.
November 27th, 2006 at 7:25 pm
Roger, I guess I missed the connection between what marc said and getting married…your rant was interesting, but learning how to deal with women and having fun with them doesn’t necessarily lead to marrying them.
And by the way, when a woman finds a man who can rock her world in the sack, she’s not gonna leave him for some dildo or lesbian rug-muncher. She’ll literally kiss his ass…
November 27th, 2006 at 7:29 pm
So far, emarel is the FIRST guest commenter to get it.
“when a woman finds a man who can rock her world in the sack, she’s not gonna leave him for some dildo or lesbian rug-muncher. She’ll literally kiss his ass…”
This is exactly right, directly from my chapter (and article) called “The Power of Aural Sex.”
Congratulations, emarel.
November 27th, 2006 at 11:39 pm
Glad to hear you found lust emarel.
Hope it lasts. Hope there is more to your relationship then a good roll in the hay.
Now Christopher Reeve, he truly found a worthy woman, Dana Reeve. Nine years as a quadraplegic, and she did not leave him. He played Superman, she WAS Superwoman.
Perhaps there is more to it than an earthquake in the sack?
Please see Gordon E. Finley’s article on Shelly Barreras for another example of a worthy women for whom there is more to life than a properly tickled pink.
November 27th, 2006 at 11:53 pm
Roger, please stop fuming here. We all know how and what you think.
You blast any guy who expresses any positivity towards women, towards sexual pleasure with women. Enough already.
November 28th, 2006 at 12:19 am
Marc, it is sad that you so misunderstand me.
November 28th, 2006 at 12:46 am
Roger, you will likely misunderstand my point, but I ought to try to make it regardless: shut your figurative piehole and TRY to understand Marc’s and Emarel’s points, instead of demonstrating once again the same fine grasp of men, women, and relationships that a concussed kitten might manage.
Whether you are bright enough or honest enough to admit it, physical attraction, sexual satisfaction, and other aspects of lust are important parts of men’s relationships with women.
Physical attraction and sexual satisfaction are not necessarily the ONLY important parts of those relationships, but certainly a couple of the most important parts for most.
Dana Reeve might qualify for sainthood, or she may have simply enjoyed caring for her husband, or she may have enjoyed the limelight….. but if they were never sexually attracted to one another, it’s doubtful that they would have ever bothered to marry in the first place.
You might be as daft as a brick…… but if you stop behaving like a sulking child because Marc will not permit you to post your usual exhortions for enforcement of something or other, you might actually learn something about the nature of men, women, and contemporary relationships from him, or from posters like Emarel.
November 28th, 2006 at 1:49 am
fourthwire! What brought that on?
I understand the point Marc and emarel make.
I express skepticism about their point, and it is like suggesting to Al Gore skepticism of his Global Warming theories.
One can understand a proposition, and still disagree in part with the proposition.
I do agree that if you can rock a woman’s universe in the sack, on the couch, in the forest, in an elevator, a public restroom during a Seahawks Game, and in other scenarios, you have a fun girlfriend! She might be loyal to you! It might all work out for you.
I merely suggest that if there is not more to your relationship than that, you are better off not having any money for her to take.
When she gets bored with it.
And certainly no kids.
November 28th, 2006 at 3:52 am
Roger, “what brought that on” was certainly not malice, nor vitriol for vitriol’s sake.
And I am pleased to read that you have apparently not mistaken my intentions as such.
If you can rock a woman’s universe in the sack, you have a fun girlfriend, as you have noted.
Any woman who does not make a fun girlfriend CERTAINLY isn’t worth considering in terms of building greater commitments (involving contractual obligations, legal obligations, or reproduction) with, IMO.
And from a man’s perspective, a fun girlfriend goes quite some way toward improving most men’s quality of life.
For many men, who have never been married, or who have already been divorced, a fun girlfriend beats the hell out of a wretched marriage, or worse yet, a monthly child-support or vaginamony check.
And in Western nations, I doubt very much that men are better off “not having any money for her to take” under any circumstance that you care to name.
Men are generally better off when they can determine when, where, and on whose account they spend their own money.
As you already know, that freedom may involve personal commitment to the marriage boycott, or iron-clad prenuptial agreements, and birth control, not to mention that knowledge and understanding that men like Marc are trying to share.
November 28th, 2006 at 6:35 am
fourthwire, your kind words are most appreciated.
You realize, of course, that “shut your figurative piehole” might leave an adverse impression.
November 28th, 2006 at 7:05 am
I think what Marc has created has value specifically if you are dealing with American or Western Women..
However the fact that you are dealing with these types of women even if you think it’s just purely for sexual fun brings on a host of other issues that are not healthy for long term growth and happiness.
You might want to consider other options outside of your own country. Many guys open up their “market choices” to women in Asia and South America.. I did it for Russia and have written extensively about it in my blog.
Here is an article that you might want to check out in relation to these dating methods that are so popular to exercise in the US. Cheers GL
http://russianwomen.wordpress.com/2006/10/06/high-maintenance-women-and-what-to-do-with-them-2/
November 28th, 2006 at 9:21 am
When you don’t please women in bed, they will cheat on you and/or leave you (If a woman doesn’t please me in bed, I will leave her). If you wine & dine women, you will attract women who fake their orgasms. These women want you only for your wine and food. Period. Grasp this concept!
While pleasing women in bed probably makes more sense than throwing money at them, I have to also give kudos to Roger Knight: the problems with American women are not due to them not finding sexual satisfaction in bed.
50 years ago in the states, most women didn’t mind not having orgasms and treated men better overall. So this alone can’t be the main reason for the behaviour of modern American women.
November 28th, 2006 at 9:51 am
If you are complaining about giving women orgasms, and complaining that women want you to give them orgasms, it is because you don’t know how to do it. It is as plain as day. That is why I wrote my book. Even when I describe this book over the phone to women, they get turned on. That, my friends, is power. If you think I don’t know what I’m talking about, you’re WRONG.
If we have a conversation, and you are not a stimulating contributor to the conversation, I will not want to converse with you in the future. If we play tennis, and you are not a stimulating, exciting opponent, I will seek other opponents in the future. If I hire you as a speaker, and you do not stimulate the audience, I will not bring you back to speak again.
Sex, like everything else in life, requires stimulating participants who KNOW what they’re doing, WANT to please each other, and DO please each other. This concept is so basic, it’s like describing gravity — yet, some guys don’t want to hear it. What a pity.Â
This nonsense about what women wanted 50 years ago or what they want in other countries is lunacy. Women are women are women are women. Women in every country, and in every era, want orgasms, period. Ignore this truth at your own peril.
Read my book. It will change your life. It will make you a desirable guy. Or, remain naive and uninformed, and complain and complain and complain — and then make a date with your hand.
November 28th, 2006 at 10:17 am
I’ve started posting on some “men’s rights” or mens issues sites. It seems that more men are concerned w/ bashing women than improving themselves.
What’s this about women not minding if they had orgasms? Since when is that ok?
I’m not a huge fan of “racial escapism” as one blogger put it. If you are in US and paying and getting no results, then you got to Singapore and start paying you MAY get some results. But you are still PAYING. Isn’t that the real issue?
Mr. Rudov: I heard you for the first time on Leykis (I’ve even been able to speak to Tom!) I was hooked after your Garden of Eden essay. Pls, keep up the good work.
November 28th, 2006 at 10:27 am
Thanks for the kudos, Mr. Zoid. It’s always good to hear from sensible, knowledgeable readers, like you and fourthwire. Glad you caught my appearance on Leykis’s show. I do hope to return there soon.
Also, please join my mailing list to get my NoNonsense Dating Tips.
I do hope you will get a copy of Under the Clitoral Hood, so you can validate it for the skeptics.
November 28th, 2006 at 1:52 pm
Thanks for your kind words, Marc. It’s not rocket science.
Y’know, it’s such a shame that, by the time a man has accumulated the maturity, knowledge, experience and, especially, the patience to bring a woman to orgasm, he’s often a bit older like me (53), and is at the point where his big head has taken over most of his thinking. This is why books like Marc’s and others are so valuable…they offer a means of gaining this awareness at an earlier age to men who want it.
I have met and dated many women in the past 3 years since my 20 year marriage fell apart, and found the majority of them to be the types that Marc warns against. I’ve walked away from at least three who loved what I did to them in the sack (one who wanted to continue in a friends “plus” relationship), but who didn’t offer what I needed in return. So yes, Roger, sex without the rest of it isn’t the end-all of things. True enough. And yeah, a time or two I was blinded by my attraction to entitled women, but not for long. I’m now involved with a woman who is a peer, who reciprocates, who gives as much as she gets, who’s told me several times that she loves me…and she’s multi-orgasmic. It doesn’t have follow that I’m getting married again anytime soon, however.
They are out there, if you will just take your time.
November 28th, 2006 at 2:09 pm
Great comment, emarel.
And for those who still choose to misconstrue and misunderstand my words, grasp one basic point: a woman must truly like you to have real orgasms; and you must know what you’re doing to give them to her. There is a LOT behind this statement. Think about it.
Stop fighting reality. Learn. Get Under the Clitoral Hood today.
November 28th, 2006 at 4:29 pm
Thank you PolishKnight.
Thank you, emarel.
Marc, we are on the same side, lets stop fighting each other.
November 30th, 2006 at 5:00 pm
I’m staying eternally single so I have no problem boinking any woman and I really don’t give a rat’s butt if they orgasm or even if they like it. I’m taking a page out of the Feminist Manifesto. Boink them all. It’s a buffet out there, guys. All we need is some cash (and not to much of it) to score. I’m plug ugly and even I can score some hot chicks.
November 30th, 2006 at 9:27 pm
Back to reality. I know a lot of you are fans of Rudov, but let’s never forget that he doesn’t care about any of you or about helping women achieve orgasm. He is in business to sell a book. A book he claims will bring women to orgasm as he discusses its contents to women over the phone. Yeah, it also makes monkeys fly out of womens butts.
Maybe next he’ll tell us he just walks into singles bars with a copy of his book and every woman who looks at it is suddenly pregnant.
My, what powers this man has! What a real Don Juan! I’m so impressed I can’t wait to follow his link and buy his book.
November 30th, 2006 at 9:58 pm
mazza,
If I were as short-sighted, uncaring, and disingenuous as you claim — because you haven’t read or don’t understand or cannot apply the principles my book — I wouldn’t have such a strong following and such happy customers, both male and female.
Perhaps you should have a woman read it to you. She’ll be glad to tell you what you fail to understand or show you where you’re going wrong.
November 30th, 2006 at 9:58 pm
“So far, emarel is the FIRST guest commenter to get it.”
Yeah, so buy my book! You’ll finally have a perfect relationship, just buy my book.
/watches how fast the comments are deleted.
November 30th, 2006 at 10:06 pm
Ha ha, I understand what some of you guys are saying. But remember, this is a blog from HIS site. Many people have products related to these topics. Marc Rudov does not have the market cornered on relationship/dating changework, fee-based or free. That said, I will continue to listen to the podcasts and read the articles. There is a lot of value in them. You guys should check them out.
November 30th, 2006 at 10:12 pm
Have you noticed that the guys reading my works, and succeeding as a result, are NOT throwing rocks at me? Have you noticed?
Frustration presents itself in interesting ways, doesn’t it.
December 1st, 2006 at 9:52 am
“If I were as short-sighted, uncaring, and disingenuous as you claim — because you haven’t read or don’t understand or cannot apply the principles my book — I wouldn’t have such a strong following and such happy customers, both male and female.”
Who said these things? I think most of us know you are simply selling a book. Simple self-confidence and directness with women will win any man success. Finding women for relationships or sex is simply a matter of meeting and talking to women until you make a connection. It is the simplest thing on earth and 99% of people do it naturally and easily.
You have no special information. All your talk is just marketing nonsense to get lonely people to buy your book.
You’d have a lot more credibility if you’d simply admit your main interest is making a buck.
December 1st, 2006 at 6:12 pm
Almost everyone’s main interest is in making a buck.
So what?
December 6th, 2006 at 10:31 pm
On Saturday night, December 9, 2006, at 11PM PST/2AM EST,
I will be an in-studio guest with Emily Morse on her radio show,
‘Sex with Emily’ — http://www.SexWithEmily.com
You didn’t think you were going to hear me make a woman
scream, did you?
If you don’t live in the Bay Area (San Francisco/San Jose),
the way to hear the show is through the Website of KIFR
106.9FM (CBS Radio) — http://www.1069FreeFM.com.
Click on “live” at the top of the page. Preregistration required.
The call-in number is 1.888.500.1069
May 5th, 2007 at 4:56 pm
[...] does this scenario differ from the one I described in “How to Lure a Golddigger,” in which Cristine Gomez, 21, who “dated” an older man she had met on wealthymen.com, bragged [...]